The Barrister's Ball

Last night was the Barrister’s Ball, which is more commonly referred to as the Law School Prom. It was a really great time with a good dinner, good drinks, and a fun time dancing. Looking back at though I thought it would be funny to give out awards based on what I saw last night. Marcia helped me pick the winners and because of this her and I are not eligible to win any of the awards.

THE “BEST DRESSED MALE” AWARD

Any time someone can come to a black tie event in a Finding Nemo cumber bun and bow tie they will win this category. I am going to go out on a limb here and say that this an unprecedented attire to wear to the Law Prom. Tom Mallon, this award is for you my friend. Good job.

(Side Note: Carl Hessler was a close second. He wore a green suit, with a tan suede vest with a green shirt underneath. On top of all of this he wore tan New Balances sneakers with the saying “I never give up comfort to look good.” Kudos to you Mr. Hessler.)

THE “BEST DRESSED FEMALE” AWARD

The most debated category between Marcia and I but in the end we decided that the dress we liked the best was Katie Walker’s green dress. It was absolutely stunning. What was the deciding factor was Marcia saying this, “I absolutely love that dress. I really want to borrow that from her.” If Marcia wants to wear it, it’s a winner.

THE “O BROTHER WHERE ART THOU” AWARD

To Chris Rusca who I saw at dinner for 30 seconds, introduced me to his date and then I never saw again. Honestly where did you go? My guess is that you had three beers and went back to your room to pass out for the night. Actually without any other knowledge I am willing to bet $50 that this happened.

THE “FATE HAS A FUNNY WAY OF SHOWING ITSELF” AWARD

At 9:27pm I told Grant, who was standing next to the iPod, to put on some damn Journey. He claimed that it was too early and that the iPod only had one Journey song. I backed off and told him that at 10pm Journey will be played and no will stop me. At 9:58pm I yelled over to Mark Vanni to get the shuffle off and put on some Journey. As he was looking in the other iPod to find Journey the iPod Shuffle started playing Journey “Don’t Stop Believing”. That my friend is fate.

THE “ARTIE LANGE INAPPROPRIATE JOKE OF THE NIGHT” AWARD

To Ricco’s Fiancé Jenny who after Mike brought back the single biggest vodka and tonic ever made had this great comment, “I think Mike is trying to get me drunk, he is probably going to try and rape me in the butt later.” I don’t even need to make a joke or comment about that one.

THE “JOHN MILKO MOST LIKELY TO PEE SOMEWHERE INAPPROPRIATE” AWARD

To Alix’s boyfriend John. At our dinner table he told us that he wasn’t a big drinker yet was drinking his face off. He was pounding glasses of scotch on the rocks. His face was as red as tomato and I just got the feeling that he was going to be in a bad place later that night. I could be wrong but that was just my feeling. This was more of an attempt to take a stab at Milko to tell you the truth.

THE “DR. FRANKENSTEIN GREAT IDEA AT THE TIME THAT PROBABLY DIDN’T TURN OUT TO WELL” AWARD

Katie Walker is our first double winner of the night. While partying in her room the hotel security came up and started looking for the registered guest of the room. That would be Katie Walker. Instead of staying and talking to the security, Katie decided to run out and head down to the party. Lets think out about this for a second. They know who the room is registered to. Eventually this will get back to Katie. Regardless congrats on being a double winner.

THE “MOTLEY CRUE OF THE 80’S” AWARD

This award goes to the person that wanted to get after it more then anyone else. I am giving this one to Mike Rosati. The moment he walked into the party the party was just lifted to a higher level. The 80’s music was pumping and he was singing along without a care in the world. He and the dance floor were one. When I grow up I want to party like Mike Rosati does today.

THE “MOMENT OF THE NIGHT” AWARD

I wouldn’t believe it if I didn’t see it with my own eyes. Just spectacular. Just remember this, You don’t hunt the cougar, the cougar hunts you.

NBA's Greatest Players

In 1996, the NBA came out with its 50 greatest players list to commemorate the 50-year anniversary of the formation of the NBA. There was a great ceremony at the 1997 All Star Game where 47 of the 50 players selected were present. (“Pistol” Pete Maravich had passed away, Shaquille O’Neal was injured and was not at the game, and Jerry West elected not to participate).

It has been 11 years since that list was published so I thought to myself, if the list was to add 11 people who would those 11 players be? Would they be the people that were snubbed from the last list or would they be all younger up and comers? Here are the 11 players I thought that would make the cut as the next 11 in. The list is not in any particular order.

1. Dominique Wilkins – the biggest snub on the original list. The guy retired as the 6th all-time leading scorer and was the most ferocious dunker of the 80’s and early 90’s. He was one of the best players of the 80’s along with Bird, Magic, Ewing, a younger Jordan, etc. Too not have him on the original list almost lost the list all of its credibility.

2. Tim Duncan – a three time NBA champion who I believe is the greatest power forward of all time (I know he is 7’ but he is a power forward as long as San Antonio keep bringing in Bums like Umberto and Nesterovic to play Center next to him). The “Big Fundamental” is one of the most consistent players in NBA history at 22 ppg and 12 rpg throughout his career. If you had to pick one guy to start a team around it would be him.

3. Kobe Bryant – I hate Kobe Bryant. He ruined what could have been the greatest dynasty in sports since the Celtics of the 50’s and 60’s but you can’t deny his ability. There is not a better scorer in the NBA then Kobe Bryant. Any game he could score 50 points. He may have driven Shaq out of LA and been accused of Rape in Colorado and be on cheap ass player but he is an unbelievable talent.

4. Allen Iverson – How he isn’t dead yet I do not know. He is listed at 6’ (I think he is even smaller) and only weighs 165 lbs yet he attacks the rim like no one his size has ever done. He gets destroyed every game but still averages 28 ppg which is second all time behind Michael Jordan and Wilt Chamberlain. The best 6 footer in the history of the NBA.

5. Dirk Nowitski – The first European Born Superstar. Is one of, if not the, best players in the NBA today. He started as only a pure jump shot shooter that has transformed his game into a well-rounded player in the last couple of years. My idol said in a column once “"Dirk is playing at a higher level than any forward since Bird.” Anytime you can be in the same sentence as Bird (Basketball Jesus) you are a top player in my book.

6. Lebron James – I know he has only been the league now for a couple of years but this guy is going to be on the same level as MJ, Bird, and Magic someday. Last year he averaged 32 ppg, 7 rpg, and 6.6 apg. Just absolutely freakish for a 21 year old. He is on pace right now to break every career scoring record. The best of the best right now in the NBA.

7. Dwayne Wade – What made Bird and Magic so great? There incredible talent for one but the competition against one another pushed each other over the top. Lebron and Wade are going to be battling against each other for years. Before he got hurt this year Wade was averaging 29 ppg, 8 ppg, and 4 rpg. He has already won a championship and it won’t be his last. These two young guys are going to carry the NBA for many years to come.

8. Steve Nash – The Best Point Guard in the game today. A winner of two straight MVP awards and it appears that he will be on his way to a third. He can completely take over a game with even scoring a point. The single biggest team player since Basketball Jesus. In the changing environment of the NBA where isolation and one on ones are the most go to plays, the Phoenix Suns stay away from it with great team basketball and it is only possible through the play of Steve Nash.

9. Jason Kidd – Before Nash burst onto the scene as the consummate point guard there was Jason Kidd. The triple-double machine. He can literally do it all. He scores (without a decent jump shot), he is a great assist guy and for a guard he is one hell of a rebounder. He is also a great defender being a First Team Defense four times and its Second Team four times as well. One of only three players in NBA history to record at least 13,000 points, 6,000 rebounds, and 8,000 assists in his playing career (the others are the Big “O” and Magic.)

10. Kevin Garnett – A career average of 21 ppg, 11.3 rpg, and 4.5apg. A winner of the MVP in 2003-2004 season and the most intense player of all time. Just look at his face and it scares you. A ten time NBA all-star and one of the best defensive players in the NBA. He has redefined the Power Forward Position as one that steps away from the basket. The only knock is that he can’t win the big game and has never gone far into the playoffs.

11. This spot is for you my audience to decide. I can’t think of who to put in this spot. I’m looking toward you America to help me decide who number 11 on my list is. The only requirement is that they have played in the NBA and are not already on the 50 Greatest Player List. Help Me America. If I made this list in 3 years I am pretty sure Kevin Durant would have this spot.

As always feel free to comment on this blog or to send me an email at jkazanovicz@gmail.com. Send any questions and or Comments to that address.

The Hodgepodge 3-27-07

I really enjoy the show Jeopardy. It is the most basic of the game shows and I would like to think that it is the most classic of them all. My favorite category is generally the sports categories where I think I have run every one for the last year and a half. But my next favorite category is Hodgepodge. For those that don’t know what I mean it is a catch all category. It means they have these good questions but no common theme between them. Well with this blog I sometimes have these observations but no underlying theme between them. Just a few random thoughts that don’t have anything to do with each other. I will call these columns the “Hodgepodge”.

1) I have two pet peeves in this world: girls that wear miniskirts with Uggs boots and people that dress up their pets in human clothing. Lets look at these separately. A girl would wear a miniskirt if it is warm and they want to show some skin. A girl would wear Uggs boots if it was cold and they wanted comfortable footwear. How in the hell do these two go together? I mean honestly, do girls think this looks good because they look freaking ridiculous. This would be like a guy wearing a sleeveless tanktop with a scarf. I am pleading to my women readers (there are like two of them by count) to stop this immediately. I propose a bill to congress to make this illegal. The other one is people that dress their dogs or cats in clothes. Last time I checked most animals have fur therefore no need for a freaking sweater. Your dog looks like an idiot and you look like an idiot for making them dress that way. I’m guessing most dogs don’t like wearing these things either. Now I don’t talk to any dogs so I don’t really know this but I’m just guessing that they don’t want to wear these things. Honestly last year in San Diego over Christmas break I was visiting Marcia. We went to pick up dinner for her family and what do we see? A teenage girl wearing a miniskirt with Uggs on her feet walking her Pomeranian that was wearing a sweater. My head nearly exploded off my shoulders. Both of my pet peeves happening at the same time. I am not making this up people. Marcia was there you can ask her. I was near tears.

2) The officiating at the end of the first half and beginning of the second half of the Georgetown/UNC game was as bad as I have seen in years but it wasn’t bad going both ways. Every call was going in UNC’s favor. I haven’t seen something this lopsided since the Kermit Washington Rudy Tomjanovich Fight (or Tara Reid’s first boob job. I couldn’t decide which joke to go with so I went with both of them). This is the game to get to the Final Four and the officials almost put Georgetown into a hole that they couldn’t get out of. Luckily Roy Williams forgot he had timeouts and Georgetown was able to pull it out.

3) In Marcia’s most recent blog post she mentioned that I had tried to sabotage her bracket both this year and last year. While in both years she has asked for my opinion and I have given it to her it has been a coincidence that it has turned out to be really bad advice. In my defense Florida has always choked in the tournament. Every year they got beat by someone who should have beaten them. This year she read me her original Final Four and I told her that I thought there were too many top seeds there. I told her she would probably want to mix it up. She did and now she is pissed when all the top seeds make it far. I apologize. These are not intentional sabotages. I still stick with my original opinions. She’s just a stupid girl that I am trying to help when it comes to sports.

4) Has anyone ever actually seen or been to a Sonic fast food restaurant? I see these commercials all the time but have never seen one of these establishments. I drove from Boston to California going through many states and seeing probably every fastfood joint on the planet except for a freaking Sonic. I am starting to think they don’t actually exist kind of like the original moon landing.

Marcia's Column #2

I subscribe to cosmo, so obviously I like it, but I have to say the April issue I got a couple of days ago was by far my favorite.

Here is a list of interesting things I learned in this month's cosmo. . .

1. If Craig Young tries to use a "coy line" on you, like "Aren't you hot, why don't you take your shirt off?" or "I'm tired, let's take a nap", he's trying to get you into bed. Thank you, Cosmo, for telling me that when a guy "coyly" suggests I take off my clothes or get in a bed with him, that he wants to have sex with me. . . that was a hard code to crack.

(side note to people from Brown: the reason I mentioned Craig Young in particular is because he is pictured in this month's Cosmo in the "the secrets behind his seduction style" as the guy who uses "coy lines")

2. In ancient Greece if a man was caught cheating, they would punish him by sticking a radish in his rectum. . . I think this rule should be reinstituted as a formal punishment in our justice system, immediately

3. Guys who have blue eyes are naturally more attracted to girls with blue eyes because then if the woman has a brown eyed child (basically impossible genetically to have a brown eyed child with 2 blue eyed parents) he knows that its not his. . . it helps him "know his children". 1. I am excited that within the population of blue eyed guys I have an advantage. . . think about these guys who are blue eyed. . . Brad Pitt, Matthew Mc Conaughey (aren't you jealous?) 2. if I do end up with a brown eyed guy (I am currently dating one), that means I can have anyone's child and he'll never know!! Well, maybe not ANYONE, if the child were a different race that would probably be a good indication that it wasn't his. . . damn it.

4. Putting a condom on with your mouth is called "Italian style". Why would you feel the need to put a condom on with your mouth? Apparently since I am Italian this should be a regular occurrence for me, but I see this ending in 2 very bad ways. . . 1. latex mouth (I can not say from experience that latex tastes bad, but I can't imagine it tastes good) and 2. a hole in the condom from your teeth. Perhaps it's the non- Italian half of me that dislikes latex mouth and unplanned pregnancy.

As a final note for the week I would like to mention how badly Kaz has screwed me over in my last 2 march madness brackets:

In 2006, he convinced me that Florida was a bad pick because they "always choke in the tournament" and

in 2007, he told me that "I picked too many # 1's, 2's, and 3's" and claimed that you never get that many top seeds in the elite eight. Apparently, I did not learn my lesson in 2006, because I got rid of my initial bracket and tried to pick some lower ranked teams. Now I am second to last in my work bracket and it's his fault that I am now perpetuating the stereotype of the dumb girl who knows nothing about sports

I haven't yet decided if he purposely sabotages me or he's just an idiot . . . I'm betting on idiot (though he'll probably convince me that a smarter bet would be to assume I'm just a dumb girl. . . what a jerk)

What Really Grinds My Gears #1

When I decided I was going to write a blog I thought to myself, "You should really get your brother to write a column about what pisses him off. He is a really angry individual." When approached with the topic he jumped through the roof and had a column in my email inbox within 35 minutes. Here is that column...

My name is Jared Kazanovicz, and I am the younger brother of the normal author of this blog. When my brother told me that I could write something for his blog, I immediately knew what I was going to write about.

What the hell is so great about this Owen Wilson character? I think he is a no talent ass-clown. Most of you are going to be like, “wow, how can you not like the movie ‘Wedding Crashers.’” And this is what I have to say to you. I loved the movie more than any other movie in the past couple of years (except of course the recently awesome movie 300, but that’s another topic) I just hate Owen Wilson more than anything. Three things made Wedding Crashers, and Owen Wilson was not one of them. 1) Vince Vaughn is a genius in his own right and deserves a statue erected of him in his honor. 2) The character, Todd added that little homosexual comic relief that any good movie needs, and did it with precision and accuracy. 3) The short but hilarious role of Will Farrell put the icing on the cake as any movie becomes much better with him in it. Owen Wilson added nothing to this movie but was a good supporting role to Vince Vaughn and the other characters in the movie who were much more hilarious than he was. A much more hilarious and better actor could have played Owen’s character, which is Ben Stiller.

And please don’t bring up any other movie that Owen Wilson is in that you think is good because of him. Every movie that he is in, that does well, is because of the other actors around him, whose performances make the movie. ‘Zoolander’, was made famous by again Will Farrell and the already mentioned better acting of Ben Stiller. The only movie, in my opinion, that makes Owen Wilson not look like a total douche bag is the movie ‘Starsky and Hutch.’ Again, the movie became famous because of the superior acting of Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn and in no way did Owen Wilson have any affect on the movies success, but he actually had a few lines that made me chuckle. Other than that, he was the simple bad actor that I have known to hate.

Also, if he is such a good actor than why are there so many movies out there that have him being the ‘other guy” or supporting actor. Well there is a simple example that I am going to give and that is the movie ‘Behind Enemy Lines’ where Owen Wilson is the main character. I know for a fact that many of you have never heard of this movie because of how horrible it is, or the few of you that have scene this movie know exactly what I am talking about.

I actually retract my earlier statement about 'Starsky and Hutch' is my favorite movie with Owen Wilson in it, in the fact that the movie 'Armageddon' had Owen Wilson in it. Remember? No, because they actually killed him off midway through the movie. The Director and I have a lot in common.

Random Thoughts on the Tourney So Far

I said that I would keep my lips sealed as to the tourney after a putrid showing on the first day but after watching yesterday’s round of games I feel the need to say something. Here are a few random thoughts on yesterday’s games.

· I will let the cat out of the bag as to my super upset special of the tourney. It was TN in the Final Four. I know it was a real long shot of a pick but I just thought that there perimeter shooting and serviceable big men would give a lot of teams a lot of trouble and get them all the way until the Final Four. So I see the scoreboard in the upper right hand corner of the screen keep showing TN up by more and more you can imagine my jubilation. My super upset special of the Tourney is going to pull off not just a win but a big win. Hell they were up 20 at one point. That’s when the shit hit the fan. Are you kidding me? How do you blow a 20 point lead in the Sweet Sixteen? You are blowing the number one team in the Country out and you let up and let them back in the game? There is only one person to blame and that is you Bruce Pearl. Thanks to you my bracket is more screwed then Britney Spears after a night of drinking in Vegas.

· Aaron Gray is now officially the most overrated player in the country. You are 7’ tall and built like a truck. The tallest guy on UCLA is 6’7”. You only score 10 points and grab 6 rebounds. You my friend are just a waste of god given natural physical ability. He spent more time on the floor being knocked down by Lorenzo Matta (the single ugliest guy in college basketball) then actually defending the post or establishing the post. He should have absolutely dominated the game but no you stunk up the joint.

· Where did the 1.1 seconds go at the end of the Memphis vs. Texas A&M game? Honestly one of the worst calls in a long time. At 2.9 seconds it would have been a difficult shot. At 2.0 that shot becomes even more impossible. Let the kids play the game the way it should have been. Don’t let the officials decide the game.

· Josh McRoberts declared himself eligible for the NBA draft yesterday. I have read that he is either a lottery pick or a middle to late first round pick. Until Aaron Gray’s stinker last night I thought he was the co-most overrated player in the country with his teammate Greg Paulus (How good was he at football? I’m really quite interested because if he is this bad at hoops but the number rated Quarterback in the country, I think he made an awful awful choice) and now I’m reading that he might be a lottery pick. With this years talented draft class there is no way that McRoberts is one of the best 13 players coming out of the draft class. Honestly no way that is possible.

· Kevin Durant should declare himself eligible for the NBA draft right now. What else do you have to prove? You won the Big 12 player of the year as a freshman and will most likely win the Naismith award as well. Just call it a career at Texas and move on to take over for the NBA as a member of the Boston Celtics. Oh please god let the Celtics get 1 or 2 in this upcoming draft.

I don't know when the next column is going to come out, either this weekend or Monday but my little brother has a "What Really Grinds My Gears" post that is actually quite hysterical so be on the lookout for that.

The NFL Draft 2007

Every year we start talking about the NFL Draft earlier and earlier. This year the first talk about the NFL Draft came out in about week 13 when the Raiders where getting whacked every week. I was watching a game and the announcer starts talking about how while the season has been a huge disappointment at least the Raiders will get the number one draft pick. This is week 13. The Raiders theoretically could have won the last four games and moved down the draft board. However, everyone in the Bay Area who was a Raiders fan talked about how the number one pick was coming to Oakland. So why does it start so early each year?

I think I have finally figured this one out. Every year in the NFL 12 teams make it to the playoffs whereas the other 20 teams are done and waiting until next year. While the 12 fan bases are excited for playoff football, the other 20 have nothing to look forward to until the NFL Draft. The Draft has generally been the best way to make your team a contender over free agency. Out of the 22 Starters on the 2006 Steelers that won the Super Bowl 18 players were drafted by the Steelers. It is the quickest way to make your team better.

So for those teams that were the worst in the NFL last year the Draft is the best possible way to get your team to over the hump and to become a playoff contender. But there is always a lot of uncertainty when it comes to the Draft. When you have a top pick is the guy you draft going to be Peyton Manning or Ryan Leaf? Drew Bledsoe or Rick Mirer? Eddie George or Lawrence Phillips? Picking the wrong guy can send your team back into a downward spiral whereas you thought your team was going to be on top.

So who are the players in this year’s draft that can put your team over the top? Which are the five guys that are good enough to make your team a great team just by picking them? Here are the five guys that I see being the five best players coming out of the college game this year.

1) Calvin Johnson, WR, Georgia Tech – The best player coming out of college this year. He is 6’5” 235lbs and ran a 4.35 at the combine (he originally wasn’t going to run but decided to at the last minute and borrowed someone else’s shoes). He has freakish hands and the ability to out jump anyone. Can make any passing attack a much more dangerous one. If the Raiders didn’t have so many other issues he would definitely be the number one pick. However early WR picks in the last couple of drafts haven’t turned out to be the best Pros. Mike Williams, Troy Williamson, Charles Rogers, etc. I think he will break the mold though. He is just too good. Will probably be taken by Tampa Bay with the 4^th pick.

2) JaMarcus Rusell, QB, LSU – A 6’6” quarterback with an absolute rocket of an arm. Can make any throw and despite weighing in at the combine at 265lbs can move fairly well. Throws the deep ball incredibly well and always came up big in the big game. (See the Tennessee and Notre Dame games from this year). Will most likely be the number one draft pick by the Raiders because of Al Davis’s love of the vertical passing game.

3) Joe Thomas, OL, Wisconsin – A great big athletic tackle in the NFL. A great run blocker and an even better pass blocker. Understands how to play the left tackle position but could very easily more over to right tackle if needed. However, the last big name Big Ten OL, Robert Gallery, has to this date been a bust and people compare their college skill sets to be very similar to each other. I think he is a better player then Gallery and will probably be picked up by the Cardinals with the 5^th pick and move over to RT to protect the blindside of lefty Matt Lienart.

4) Adrian Peterson, RB, Oklahoma – the Best running back in the draft. Has the size and speed to be an every down back in the NFL. Can completely take over a game from the RB position. Has had quite the problem in college with the injury bug. Missed most of last year with a broken collarbone and has missed plenty of other games with other various injuries. I originally saw him going to Cleveland with the 3^rd pick but now that they have signed Jamal Lewis I’m not sure. I could see them drafting him still and use a two back set not unlike the Saints did last year.

5) Brady Quinn, QB, Notre Dame – A big time true drop back passer. He can stand in there and make any throw while taking the hit. Has been coached for the last two years by the Charlie Weis who coaches and teaches a pro offense in the college game. Is probably more ready to play in the NFL then Russell is but the upside isn’t there. Will probably be taken by Detroit with the number 2 pick because Kitna is a bum and isn’t good enough to be a NFL starter.

So those are the top five guys in this upcoming NFL Draft. I think all of these guys are going to be NFL Superstars someday. But then again I'm guessing everyone thought Ryan Leaf and Rick Mirer would be good as well. Ah fuck it the Raiders should take Zak DeOssie, OLB, Brown University, anyways and I swear I'm not biased at all.

Marcia's Column #1

Today we are going to change it up a bit and this is probably going to happen once a week. I told Marcia that I was going to write a Bill Simmons like sports/pop culture blog and that weekly I would like her to write about whatever she wanted to (Literally whatever she wants. I am not acting as an editor in anyway for these columns) as long as it dealt with sports or pop culture not quite unlike what the Sports Gals does for Simmons. Where as I thought she should be apprehensive and call me a loser, she was actually quite into having her own weekly commentary. So without further ado I bring to you the weekly Marcia Abbott column.

Lets be honest, there is one major reason why Kaz is letting me write on his blog and it's not because he's an inherently generous person. It is his desire to be the Sports Guy, or more likely his hope that his friends will come up to him and say "hey, you and Marcia are just like the Sports Guy and the Sports Gal, that's so funny" . . . though, I have to admit there are some glaring similarities and I love the sports gal. . . her columns are way more interesting than the sports guy's, so I generally skip his altogether. I also totally identify with her, mostly because I date a sports crazed guy who has major delusions about how important/ good Boston sports are.

I mean, I totally jumped on the Red Sox band wagon a couple of years ago (I justified it to myself because "I was supporting Kaz"), but the reason the Red Sox were fun to root for was because they were one of those scrappy, dirty, fun teams. I kept liking the Red Sox up until this past off-season. I mean, for all the bitching they do about the Yankees buying players, they do the EXACT same thing. . . I mean they have the 3 ^rd highest payroll in the league, but I was ok with that. I started really having distaste for the Red Sox when they paid $51 million to speak to a player- this was the action that made me realize the Red Sox are no longer the scrappy, down on their luck team everyone grew to love, they are the Yankees, but not as good at it. They don't buy as many star players as the Yankees, because they don't have enough money, not out of respect for the game or any of that other BS they claim. . . they are total sell- outs. I also hate the Patriots. . . I have nothing against the way they run their team, but they beat the Chargers in the playoffs and got Marty Schottenheimer fired, so screw them.

Believe it or not, I actually like sports, but mostly because I am super- competitive and like to yell at the TV. The only 2 sports I actually watch on a regular basis are baseball and football. I like baseball, because I actually know something about the game (I was a division 1 softball player in college, pitcher, actually), so I enjoy watching the strategy behind what pitches they are throwing, etc. My favorite 2 pitchers are Andy Pettitte and Kyle Farnsworth. Andy Pettitte is actually a pretty solid pitcher, plus he's got that intimidating stare over his glove thing going on and he's a good looking Italian guy. . . the southern accent really throws me off though, so I try not to listen to him speak. I'm not sure if Kyle Farnsworth is even a pitcher anymore (last I checked he was on the Yankees), but the reason I like him is because of the game when he was on the Cubs, pitching against the Reds and "Dumbass" Wilson (I don't know his real first name) charged the mound. Farnsworth proceeded to tackle him and make him look like a little girl. . . I instantly fell in love

I like football because watching people hit each other is fun . . . I am actually beginning to really appreciate how complex their plays are too, I mean it really is the ultimate team sport. My favorite football player is LaDainian Tomlinson . . . enough said.

St. Patty's Day 2007

Let me start this post of by saying that I have never been a big fan of St. Patrick's Day. Yeah, you can all hate me and tell me how much of an idiot I am, but honestly this day has never done anything for me. I don't believe the Irish should get their own day where as the Italians have nothing but that is not what this post is about. Today though was different. It actually turned out to be a great day. It all started yesterday afternoon when I got together with some old Brown friends that I hadn't seen since we all graduated last year. (Side Note: We both live in the Bay Area and it took us that long to get together. I blame myself for being a lazy asshole but that is just a ridiculously long period of time to not see some people that you live so close to). These people throw a party at their house and we raged. Speed quarters, enough booze to kill even the most hardened of drinkers, etc, it was just an awesome time. The problem was that I so over did it the night before that I didn't have any energy or the stomach to drink any more today. I left the city at about 5pm and came just home and laid on the couch.

So how did this day turn out to be a great day you ask? Because Entourage was on when I got home. Let me tell you how much I love this freaking show and the fact that it is coming back on for a Fourth Season on April 8th makes it the day I am most looking forward to in the upcoming month. Vince, Drama, E, Turtle, Ari, Lloyd are such a good ensemble of a cast that it literally makes every episode a much see because you never know what is going to happen. It has become a show that every Monday you have to talk to your other friends about what the funniest line/part of the previous episode.

With so many memorable lines who is the character that generally tops the pile as the funniest character on the show?

The three that the general consensus think are the funniest are Drama, Turtle and Ari.
I go with Drama. Johnny Chase, Vince's Brother, is a washed up actor from the late 80's, early 90's that is riding on his brother's coattails, always looking for his next big break. He starred in a show in the past called "Viking's Quest" where his catchphrase was to scream "Victory" as loud as he could. Drama is always trying to give everyone advice as to how to survive in Hollywood and brings up all these great references as to how he had guest spots on show and all the co-stars he worked with. When Season 3 ended he was on the set of a pilot where he is playing the older Irish brother in NYC. He gets too nervous to do his walking monologue that he decided to "rub one out" in his trailer to rid him of his nerves. The only problem is that he left his microphone on and everyone on the set heard him do it. Instant comedy when the director called him out in front of the entire cast and crew.

(Side Note #2: When talking about Entourage to my buddy Mike Rosati he posed this great question, "How much would you pay to see an episode of Viking's Quest?" Interesting question. I think I would pay $500 to see an old episode of the mythical Viking's Quest but only if I could see Queen's Boulevard and Aquaman as well. Yeah all three of them for $500 sounds about right)

If you didn't know it, Entourage's executive producer is Mark Wahlberg and is apparently based on his life. So here is the one problem I have with the show. If it is based on Marky Mark's life then Vince should be getting in a hell of a lot more trouble with the cops. Wahlberg was arrested 20 times before the age of 16 and was apparently a total mess of a human being when he first got to LA. Where is that aspect of his life? The only complaint I have with the entire show.

So April 8th, my buddy Mr. Tommy Hartnett has already said that he is going to have me over to watch the season premiere on his 60" plasma and I can't wait. It has become one of three shows that I will stop everything I am doing to make sure I catch it (the other two are 24 and The Sopranos). So I expect you all to get yourself fired up and make sure you catch the Season 4 premiere of Entourage on April 8th. (Side Note #3: The Sopranos premieres that night as well but I was too tired to write a whole column on that as well. Plus you all know how I feel about that one.) So watch the show or I will beat the hell out of you and the only reason I can get away with saying that is because, "I am Queen's Boulevard".

(Last note: My bracket is so messed up that I won't make any more comments about the Tourney unless my big sleeper that as of right now is still in it makes it to the Final Four. Unless that happens my lips are sealed.)

NCAA Tournament Day 1

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Welcome to My Blog

Hello everyone,

If you are reading this then you probably know all about me and if you don't know me and are reading this then I am really creeped the hell out. I'm going to be using this space to tell you whats on my mind. This could be anything from sports to world events to pop culture to really anything I feel like talking about. If you don't like what I have to say, don't read it, I could really give two shits. I make this one promise to you though, I will never discuss anything law related on this space. I'm already bored with it so I don't want to bore any of you. Other then that just sit back, relax, and read what the hell I'm talking about.